feeling highly un-spectacular

and un-reasonably down on self today. This comes from a) comparing self to others (I know, an ugly road to go down, as it results in jealousy and unreasonable expectations, and b) not making book progress and c) feeling like said book is, well, just plain horrible.
In reference to:
a) this woman just wrote her second book. That’s cool, right? In Eleven Weeks. She wrote a book in eleven weeks. I’ve been writing the same damn book for over a year and I don’t even have a full draft. It’s hard to avoid comparisons in that scenario. Also, a friend of mine just got a teaching gig. Teaching college! She’s 24. I’m almost 34. I don’t have a college teaching gig. I am jealous of the motivation/success occurring there, as she has a very cool full-time job in publishing, too. I have no cool full-time job or teaching gig. And no first book, let alone second book written in 11 weeks..
b) I’m stuck on wedging this one #@!%#@!! scene in to the book (where??!) and time is running out. Stress!
c) I hate my book. There’s not much else to say about that.

Ok, pity party over now. I must get to work. Apologies for this maudlin post.


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